My Ranking of the Wrong Turn Films

The murderous hillbilly/in-bread family sub genre of horror is very played out. We all know of the most popular ones, like The Hills Have Eyes or The Texas Chainsaw Massacre series, but I feel like the Wrong Turn movies are often overlooked. To me, these films are a lot of fun, and they have some of the most menacing antagonists that this sub genre has to offer. Sure they have a fraction of the budget that those other franchises have, and all but the first went straight to DVD, but maybe that's what makes them so much fun to watch. I personally enjoyed them all (to a degree). Read on for my ranking of this series.

1. Wrong Turn 2: Left for Dead (2007):
A truly awesome movie. Without a doubt the most entertaining the series. This one has great characters (no, really), amazing set pieces, and it more than delivers on the gore. The opening scene alone, where a girl is sliced clean in half vertically, causing her guts to spill all over the street, is worth the price alone. I wasn't a big fan of the reality show spoof plot, but luckily the good ol' mutants break that up in no time. The kills are surprising and gory as hell, and the characters make smart decisions (for the most part). My only wish was that they went somewhere with the disgusting ending in the next sequels.

2. Wrong Turn (2003):
This is probably the best made out of all of these films, and it was the only one to have a theatrical run. The story is pretty straight forward and the characters are tolerable. The three mutants are the most scary in this one; they stick to the shadows, they're brutal, and their laughing isn't annoying yet. The kills are very cool, especially the half decapitation and the barb wire in the mouth. Overall, it's a suspenseful film with great villains and awesome kills.


3. Wrong Turn 4: Bloody Beginnings (2011):
I was pleasantly surprised with this one. After the third film being such a disappointment (more on that later), I had low expectations for this installment. I love the setting, both the abandoned asylum and the snow; It's a fresh change that the series needed. On top of that, there are some actual creepy scenes, one in particular involving a two-way mirror. The kills are outstanding. We have gargantuan drills going through bodies, a live human feast, and a great decapitation, among others. The characters were pretty stupid and the acting was subpar, but the gore and suspense made up for the weaknesses.

4. Wrong Turn 5: Bloodlines (2012):
This movie has awesome kills, and an awesome title screen... And that's pretty much it. It's definitely not as bad as other people/reviews are saying, but it's still a very weak entry in the series. Honestly, when I watch a slasher I expect two things: boobs and blood. In that respect, this movie definitely delivers. Sure, a good story and acting would've been nice, but that not a deal breaker for me. Overall, watch this one for the kills, and only the kills.

5. Wrong Turn 3: Left for Dead (2009):
The opening scene for this movie was amazing. It had awesome gore, some humor, and it gave me hope for a good movie. Unfortunately, that's where the good aspects end. The characters are all just mean, and there's no comic relief. It's just a mean spirited film that I had a hard time getting into. The cheap CGI is distracting, but it's direct to DVD so I let it slide. It's dull most of the time, and there's not enough of the three mutants. It's watchable, but it's my least favorite in the series.

Three Finger, One Eye, and Saw Tooth are great antagonists to a pretty solid series of films. When you take into account that these are just dumb, low budget slashers, you'll have fun watching them. I say take a wrong turn and check these flicks out.

The Human Centipede 2

I love extreme horror. It takes you places you wouldn't dare go in real life. The directors are fearless, and the images are grotesque. I love this genre, which is the exact reason I loathed The Human Centipede the first time I watched it. It was billed as "the sickest film ever made" and it was most definitely not. While I do respect it more now, it just was such a let down at the time. I'm fine with bloodless horror movies, but if it's advertised as a sick disgusting film, I kind of expect just that. At any rate, when the sequel came out, I was rightfully hesitant to see it. I read that it was more gross and explicit than the first one, but that didn't mean much to me. But being the horror fiend that I am, I rented it on demand, and I was completely blown away.

Everything good about the first film was magnified, and everything bad about it was addressed and promptly fixed. This time around, the film actually lives up to the hype, and succeeds in giving us a truly nasty flick.

The story revolves around Martin, a mute, disgustingly overweight guy who becomes obsessed with the first film (yes, they took a meta approach with this one). He loves The Human Centipede so much that he wants to make a creature of his own. He proceeds to capture people from the parking garage where he works, and takes them to a warehouse. He then grabs all of his household appliances (hammer, stapler, duct tape, etc) and attempts to make his own centipede. He succeeds. Oh, and it's a whopping twelve people long this time!

The film was shot in color but changed to black & white in post production because director Tom Six thought it looked scarier. I personally loved this choice as it leaves a lot to the imagination and makes the film look very raw and gritty. Also, like a lot of black & white movies these days, there is a splash of color near the end of the film (hint: it's brown).

The gore is amazing. It's very gruesome, especially when compared to the first film. This time around, we're treated with head bashing, teeth being extracted with a hammer, the caving in of faces, and messy, dirty, home-style surgery. I was very pleasantly surprised at his how deliciously gory this one was. The centipede, when finally assembled, was very cool and worth the long wait. There are also some sequences that launch it into extreme horror territory; one is a grotesque scene involving sandpaper, and another involves a baby. But, as I said, all of these things just prove that the ads were accurate this time around.

After watching this, I was so satisfied and it actually made me respect the first film more. What I hope Tom Six was thinking was, "look what I did with the first film, now look what I can do with the second." He made a somewhat disturbing film, and then he blind-sided everyone with its sequel. It's an awesome, grimy little horror flick, that will live in infamy as one of the sickest films ever made (for real this time).

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2

Remember The Texas Chainsaw Massacre? Of course you do, it's an immortal cult classic and one of the main innovators of modern horror. Everyone knows and loves the original 1974 film but to me, the 1986 sequel doesn't get enough love. Sure, it up's the gore and skimps on the true scares but taken as its own film, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 is a masterpiece.

The plot revolves around Stretch, a local radio DJ, who reluctantly becomes tangled up in the Sawyer family madness when one of their crimes gets recorded on her show. Meanwhile Lefty, a lone wolf sheriff, is on the hunt to put a stop to these horrific crimes once and for all.

There are so many great things about this movie, starting with the brilliant opening scene. The movie opens on a couple of annoying yuppies on their way to "the biggest party of the world." They call in to Stretch's radio show and harass her for a bit. They call back again later for more fun, but then they run into a mysterious truck on a bridge. The truck starts to follow the yuppies, and Leatherface appears. While the two cars are driving side by side, Leatherface starts to attack the yuppies with his trusty chainsaw. Just when the guys think they've outrun the maniacs, the guy in the passenger seat looks over to see the top of his friend's head has been sawed off. The car speeds off the side of the road, thus starting this wild ride of a movie.

That opening scene, with it's amazing Tom Savini gore and Oingo Boingo's 'No One Lives Forever' playing in the background, sets up this film perfectly. Gone is the serious tone and chills of the original. This time around, we're treated with dark comedy and over the top violence. This film is an amazing sequel because it doesn't try to be like the original, it just does its own thing.

The acting is really quite good, and all of the characters are memorable. Most notably, Dennis Hopper is appropriately whacky as the sheriff out for vengeance. He looks like he had a great time, which is always nice when a big actor does horror. Caroline Williams is also very good as the scream queen of the flick. But my personal favorite character is Chop Top played by Bill Moseley. He's gross, weird, hilarious, and scary.

Speaking of gross, the gore in this flick is amazing. Without cutting away from anything, we see heads being chainsawed in half, skin warn away around a metal plate on Chop Top's head, heads being bashed with a hammer, and someone's entire body being skinned. The effects are from Tom Savini, so you know you're in for a treat. There's even a chainsaw going through someone's body and we see it still revving! That's impressive.


The set pieces are also a major character if this film. The radio station is memorable, especially when Leatherface and Chop Top come in and pretty much destroy it entirely. But the best set in this movie, hands down, is the underground lair of the Sawyer clan. A deserted theme park is such a good place for all of the carnage and insanity to take place. I see now where Rob Zombie got the idea for his underground finale in House of 1000 Corpses. Every set is colorful, eerie, and goes with the mood of the film perfectly.

Even though it's nothing like what made the original so good, this sequel still deserves a lot of love. It's crazy, fast paced, bloody as all hell, and a really fun watch. Now, go see what all the buzzzz is about!

The Splat Pack

With horror looking dead (no pun intended) coming out of the 90's, there was seemingly no light at the end of the tunnel for our beloved genre. That is, until a group of film makers from all around the globe said enough is enough. They didn't need to have a meeting, they knew nothing of one another, but they did know that the horror genre needed a kick in the teeth. I'm talking, of course, about "The Splat Pack." Eli Roth, Rob Zombie, Neil Marshall, James Wan, Greg McLean, Adam Green, and Alexandre Aja all, in the early 2000's, decided horror needed to be edgy again. They all released unbelievably gory movies into the mainstream leaving horror fans both relieved and screaming for more. These filmmakers gave horror fans hope, and changed the face of horror for the better part of a decade. Let's look at these directors' filmographies shall we?

Eli Roth:
Eli Roth spent his parents' retirement money in order to produce his 2002 debut film Cabin Fever. It was a fun, creepy, and above all gory debut that put him on the map and got him recognized by a lot of people including Quentin Tarantino and Peter Jackson. After the success of his first movie, his sophomore film Hostel was highly anticipated. It was released in 2005 with solid reviews from critics and fans alike. He also made a sequel in 2007, Hostel Part II, which was another hit in the horror community. He hasn't directed a movie since, but he's produced many, and even acted in a few. There are rumors that his next directorial project will be a cannibal movie in the vein of Cannibal Holocaust.

Rob Zombie:
With his music showing much love to the horror genre, Zombie making a horror flick of his own seemed only right. In 2003 he released his hallucinatory debut House of 1000 Corpses. It was bizarre, trippy, and gory as hell. It has since become a cult hit. His second flick, The Devil's Rejects, a loose sequel to House, was met with very positive reviews and is still considered to be his best movie. After proving that he had some serious talent behind the camera, he went on to tackle the remake of Halloween in 2007. It was met with mixed reviews, but was box office hit. In 2009, he made the sequel, Halloween 2 with the same results. His most recent film, The Lords of Salem is currently making the rounds at festivals, and has been picked up by Anchor Bay for distribution.

Neil Marshall:
Nicknamed the king of B-movies, Neil Marshall exploded into the horror scene in 2002 with his debut Dog Soldiers, an old school style werewolf flick. This got him some serious attention, as his next movie, 2005's The Descent, gained a full theatrical run. He has since somewhat drifted away from horror as he moved on to direct Doomsday, a Mad Max-esque apocalyptic thriller in 2008, and Centurion, a sword and sandal adventure flick in 2010. Rumor has it he's returning to horror with Burst, a movie about people spontaneously combusting.

James Wan:
Back in 2004, a little film called Saw was released. It essentially created the "torture porn" sub genre and changed the way we saw horror films. James Wan finished this film in 18 days on a shoestring budget, making it one of the most successful independent horror movies ever made. He has since directed Dead Silence and Death Sentence (both released in 2007), and Insidious released in 2011. His next work is highly anticipated.

Greg McLean:
Australian born director showed off extreme talent when his debut Wolf Creek was released in 2005. It was his personal answer to Saw and Hostel and it was met with huge success. His second feature film Rogue, about a killer crocodile, was released in 2007 with very positive reviews. He hasn't directed a film since, but a sequel to Wolf Creek is reportedly in the works.

Adam Green:
Better late then never, Adam Green released Hatchet, a throwback to old school American slashers, in 2006. It was met with praise from critics and fans alike. He later directed some smaller films like Spiral in 2007, before making Frozen in 2010. Frozen proved he not only knew how to orchestrate mindless violence and gore, but also suspense and true scares. Hatchet 2 was released in 2010 as well but it came with so-so reviews. He also directed a segment in the sleazy anthology Chillerama, which was released in 2011. He is currently acting as writer and producer of a third Hatchet film.

Alexandre Aja:
French filmmaker Alexandre Aja burst into the horror scene with his gloriously gory debut High Tension in 2003. This gained him some recognition, and he came to the states for his next feature, The Hills Have Eyes, which was released in 2006. This gave him a name in the US as a horror master. He stumbled a bit with 2008's Mirrors, as it was a critical and financial bust. But, he was back to form with 2010's Piranha. He has been writing and producing since, and plans to direct another film soon.

As horror fans, we owe these guys our lives. They saved our genre from the dreadful 90's and reminded us how amazing good ol' bloody horror films can be. If you haven't seen any of these films, I say definitely check them out. They're all an extremely important part of the horror genre. Long live The Splat Pack!

The Scream Series

Ah, the 90s. The absolute worst decade for our beloved genre. All horror films were watered down, and the big franchises of the 80s were dying off. It was a very sad decade for horror, but one franchise shined through all of the crap. I am talking of course, about the Scream movies. While these movies were the exact reason that 90s horror sucked (90210-type cast, very little gore, etc.), they are good based solely on who was involved; the immortal Wes Craven and screenwriter Kevin Williamson. This dynamic duo put together the best horror films of the 90s and even one of the best horror franchises ever.

Scream (1996)
With the almighty slasher film all but extinct, the horror genre was looking very grim going into the 1990s. The MPAA was on a censorship rampage, chopping our favorite films to bits, and killing off icons. But, in the middle of the decade, Wes Craven decided to direct a little film called Scream. Scream was funny, scary, and just the shot in the arm horror needed. The self referential comedy mixed with the tried and true slasher formula was a match made in horror heaven. The acting was great, the characters were memorable (even if they were a "90210 cast"), and the gore was surprisingly brutal. It was the first horror film to actually mock and deconstruct slasher films while itself was one. It's a true horror classic, and it's up there with the best of the genre.

Scream 2 (1997)
Like the sequels jokingly mentioned in this flick, this movie surpasses the original. It's bigger, better, and improves on both what was good and bad in the original scream. Like Randy says while he's explaining sequel rules, "1. The body count is always bigger. And 2. The death scenes are always much more elaborate, with more blood and gore." This movie follows these simple rules and throw in the memorable characters and funny inside jokes the first film introduced. The kills were satisfying and so was the payoff at the end. A very worthy sequel to a great original.

Scream 3 (2000)
This is the movie in the franchise that seems to divide audiences. It's pretty low on gore and there's way too much exposition. But to me, that's the point. I think (and hope) that they were trying to make fun of how the final installments of trilogies often explain too much, and really throw in unnecessary twists. Other than that, the violence was alright, and the comedy was less present. Overall it's great of you're a fan of the franchise, but it's definitely the weakest and most forgettable in the series.

Scream 4 (2011)
I absolutely loved this movie. All of the original cast and crew returning over a decade after the third installment was enough for me to get excited for this movie. Written to make fun of how every horror movie is being remade, it slyly becomes a remake of the first film. I really enjoyed the new cast as well as the returning group. The gore was amped up for modern audiences, and it was amazing. Guts strewn across a bed, stabs to the forehead, and endless other kinds of stabbings occur. The comedy is right up there with the first Scream. It's a great movie, and supposedly the start of a new trilogy. Keep 'em coming!

The Scream franchise has cemented itself in horror history as the savior of the 90s. Without these flicks, horror fans would've lost their minds (until the splat pack, anyway). We owe a lot to this series, and I'm excited for what's to come! Now, what's your favorite scary movie?